Real or Fake?

As a parent, I'm faced with tough questions all day long. Shaping two impressionable babes into nice human beings is no easy task. For real. I walk a fine line of being pushy vs. being a pushover all. day. long. Independence vs. doing things the way I like. Working it out their own way vs. saving the smaller from being trampled. Walking to the car on their own vs. getting somewhere on time...you know, things that don't seem so difficult unless you're living it! :)

With food I try to balance making them eat what I make and being creative with what I make:

I don't know if you can tell, but she actually devoured the crackers with cream cheese, honey and raspberries.

and loves tomato soup *on* grilled cheese. Every now and then I'm stumped---like last night with the asparagus. Is it a real gag or is she faking it? I went with the old stand-by: she's faking it and kept making her eat it, handing her water and telling her to drink. I have been known to be wrong, like once or twice... Well, it came back up and I ran out of the room with my dessert so I wouldn't waste it!!

What would you do?

Bye-Bye Mommy!

The day that my first baby was born, it finally hit me how much my Mommy loves me. It was her love that got me through the emotional rollercoaster of my first week of being a new mom.

I knew that she and my hubby would put up with me, so I was free to cry over "spilled milk" or spit-up or whatever the mama drama happened to be. My friend, Toneya, is saying goodbye to her Mommy today. Mama Bonnie is flying back to KY after spending the last month in Seattle with her first grandson.

Please, post something in the comment section for Toneya and her Mommy!

Cat Lady

So, my Tuesday morning was a little more productive than it started out. I got to take pictures of some orphans to help them get adopted---not actual orphans, but animal orphans. I said a little more productive, geez!

I'm really more of a dog person than a cat person, but if I had a farm....I would definitely adopt this cat:

 

 and this one!

Both of these sweeties are at the Humane Society. The tabbyish cat is SO, so friendly and played with me the whole time I was taking pictures, rubbing up against the lens of my camera. The white one is drop-dead-gorgeous, a little shy---but once she came out of her shell, she was my BFF.

Obviously, I couldn't adopt these two. I can barely keep up with my clan as it is! ;)

...but this one is *perfect* for a big, single guy that has a heart of gold. Can't you just see that in your head? I can...

...and this one...I thought about adopting her just to give to one of my many friends who need a family dog. She is short and long and sweet, sweet, sweet. Can't you tell by the way she's peeking around the fence? :)

Speaking of the fence,  the next time they'll let me in with the dogs...you know, background check and all of that. {Disclaimer: I don't actually know the sex of any of these animals---I decided not to be *that* thorough in my research!}

Since I *don't* have a farm, one of you need to go out and adopt one of these sweethearts!!! Love them and you will too!

Ten Random Thoughts on Tuesday

1. I have a babysitter, and I am sitting at Starbucks writing to you.
2. Not that I don't have strong feelings for you, but I'm feeling like there has to be something more worthwhile I could be doing with my time away from home...
3. I'm drinking a bottle of water, because I drank my daily allotment of coffee at home (one cup).
4. Have I ever told you about the time I drank *way* too much tea at high noon in London? Remind me. I'll tell you later.
5. In an hour I'm going to the Huntsville Humane Society to take pictures of their animals to post on Petfinder.com.
6. I hope that Bev from HHS is there---we never *actually* confirmed a time.
7. It seems like kids are *way* too young to be meeting for coffee---like the ones in front of me.
8. And, I'm also having a hard time understanding the Justin Bieber hairstyle....
9. I keep thinking of our newest Hillsider baby: Baby Bheem

...and his sweet mama: Toneya! Love you guys! You too, Jay! :) 
10. I want to make my own webpage. Anyone have some suggestions?

Happy Father's Day!

The moment I realized that my husband was an amazing father was when our nurse told me. I was still in a morphine-haze when I heard her whispering through the dim light of the hospital. I focused and realized that she was talking to me. "I just thought you should know that when your husband gave her the first bath, all of the nurses stopped and watched. There wasn't a dry eye in the place. We see a lot of dads come through here, and his love and amazement was so obvious. It's so refreshing to see." By then her eyes had welled up with tears again, and, well, mine were just flowing.

Five years later, and he's still the most amazing dad I know. In the words of our first little miracle:

"Daddy is special because he cares for us and he loves us and he's so special because he loves me and he does always, always, always. I love it when we draw together, hug together, play together, make friends together, meet friends together, play together with the friends we make, to hug and kiss him, checkmarks together, races together for our whole life. We love him and we love him about all the things we love him about and how he's silly and he'll always be the one who loves us and cares for us and we can do it for our lives."

(Erin Cobb Photography)

I don't think I could've said it better. We love you, Michael! You're the best Daddy in the whole wide world! Happy Father's Day!

The Dad He Didn't Have To Be

Those of you who listen to country music understand the title. That song makes me cry every. single. time I hear it! It's about a step-dad who never remembers the "step" part of his title...

Oh, my version---my Papa Bruce has a few weaknesses: ice cream, names, attention span...but his heart of gold is obvious even to the passerby. He *adores* his family and has never batted an eye at including my sister and me in that circle of his heart. He has never once put down my biological dad, but instead has supported me privately whenever I need him, being careful to never intrude. When my dad died last year, it was Papa Bruce who told me about his death. The genuine anguish in his eyes still amazes me.

This Father's Day weekend, I want everyone to show gratitude to the fathers in their lives who consider being a dad their life's passion. Sure, they screw up sometimes...but who likes a perfectionist anyway!? :) The true testament is their undying love.

And, will you give an extra thanks for my stand-in-dad? He is a Godsend to me. Truly.

And did I mention that he *absolutely* cherishes my mom. What more can a girl ask for? Thank you, Papa Bruce! I love you!

Ten Parenting Tips on Tuesday

1. Don't *actually* flush your child down the toilet---it's okay to think about it as long as you don't follow through!
2. Be sure to keep your house messy: if it's spotless, you need to play some more!
3. During the witching hour around 4, let them "help" cook dinner. {Keep mushrooms & a butter knife handy if you can't think of any other way for them to help, let them chop mushrooms!}
4. Acknowledge that your spouse exists, even put a little sugar on it. :)
5. When someone from a different generation yells over your child's shrill scream, "Enjoy it. These are the best years of your life!" refrain from smacking them! If possible, smile and nod.
6. If one of the kiddos is a baby, make sure to find a quiet place at least once a day to sit and listen to the baby eat. Those noises are amazing, I promise!
7. Take lots of pictures, and get your family pictures taken every year by Erin Cobb!
8. Devise a plan for when all of your kids are crying. {refer to Sometimes You Gotta Choose}
9. Find some "me time," everyone will be happy that you do!
10. Give lots and lots of hugs!!

A Friend

A smile from the inside out
Life's updates woven into lunchtime
Contagious laughter
A difficult conversation
Good advice
A phonecall no matter what time
A tether when your heart detaches
Comfortable silence
A reassuring look right when you need a boost
Comfort

Better Than You

What happened? Once upon a time I had this:

...And now...

a 5-year-old!

So much life has been lived over the past 5 years. Logically, I don't want to take it away....but my heart just won't listen. It wants to swoop back to that hospital room and live in our first moment face to face. Her squall immediately stopped when her cheek touched mine. She took a breath and sighed, my presence calming her.

Elise. Leesey. My babydoll. I want to give you everything you need to grow wings and become an amazing young woman. I know in my heart that you will be a head-turner, a soul-shaker, a strong presence that radiates power for your convictions. You pick up litter that others have dropped, you donated 14" of your hair to the birds to help them make nests, you organized troops at our Derby Party to go and find our Rudy-boy.

I'm a realistic person---mostly. I understand that a strong, independent mom *might* knock heads a little with a strong independent daughter. Sometimes. It's totally "normal" for a 5 year-old to tell her mother, "I'm going to be better than you when I grow up." Let's just slow this down just a *tad* please for your mother. I want you to be better than me one day, better in every way. Just for right now, I think I'll build a storm shelter and hide out with you down there on August 8. I mean, what's your kindergarten teacher going to do to me? Come find me? Yeah, right!